Summer Fun

Here are some recent pictures! (Click on a picture to see it full-size.)

M. dancing in "Much Ado About Nothing."

E. and K. at HersheyPark.

Thank God he's still got 4+ years before he can really drive...

K. loving the Frog Hopper.

Enjoying a Senators game with K.

M. really is only 12. Really.

Belt testing day for E. & K.!

A day at the Jersey Shore.

The grandparents!

Check me out on Halushki

My dear friend Jozet is on vacation and has asked a few people to guest post on her amazing blog. Check out my Exercising With Savages post, and all of the other great offerings at Halushki when you get a chance...

...or I'll send these guys to your house!

Recent Pictures

Here's E. at Homeschool Crazy Olympics Day.





Javelin Throw.





K. in action.





Answering a question during the fire safety demonstration.





E. won a few ribbons.





So did K.





M. chose to volunteer as a helper this year instead of competing.





His soccer team was undefeated in both the spring and fall seasons.





Performing with the Homeschool Co-op Bluegrass Band.




M. and E. with the cast of A Midsummer Night's Dream.





M. up at bat.





K. says goodbye to preschool.

Why We Homeschool

I'm having One Of Those Nights. You know what I'm talking about - the kind of night where you lie awake looking back over all the choices you've ever made and trying to decide if they were the right ones, or if you've completely screwed up your life, your kids' lives, the delicate balance of the universe itself...

If you don't know what I'm talking about, consider yourself lucky and go back to sleep.

To be perfectly honest, I don't do this often. I usually sleep like a log 5 minutes after my head hits the pillow. I don't second guess or dwell or ruminate... I just do my best all day, and go to sleep at night so that I'll be fresh and well-rested so I can do it again the next day.

And now I'm ruminating when I should be sleeping. Trying to remember the certainty we felt 6 years ago when we made the decision to homeschool instead of doing what everyone else does.

Why did we do this?

It would be a good thing to remember right now. I know there were good reasons when we made the decision to do it, and good reasons to keep us doing it for all these years.

I'm making a list, so that 1) I can relax and go to sleep and 2) I'll have something to read in case this ever happens again.

Here it is, in no particular order.

1) We wanted the kids to be themselves, think for themselves, and not feel they had to conform to fit into a group of same-age peers.

2) We liked the efficiency of it. It really doesn't take 7 hours to get a day's worth of formal learning done.

3) We liked the freedom of it. We can do our work when and how it suits us best.

4) Homeschool learning is more similar to how adults learn. There are no bells telling you when to start or stop. You can follow your interest wherever it leads you, and take all the time you need to satisfy your curiosity about the subject.

5) It has allowed us more free time to pursue other interests. The kids would not have had time for all of the activities and sports and experiences they have had if they were in school all day.

6) They can learn at their own pace. Quickly through the easy stuff, taking more time to master the harder stuff.

7) They are in mixed-age settings. They are not with the same group of same-age peers all of the time.

8) We really know the kids well and can see their strengths and weaknesses in our every day lives. (Not to say that our schooling-friends don't know their kids, of course - but we knew it would have been a real challenge with one of ours if he were in school all day.)

9) We know the kids' friends and their families. Whether they homeschool or not, most of them share our core values.

10) We have been able to ground the kids in those core values, which often differ from the mainstream, secular, consumer culture.


Okay. That feels a bit better.

I have to remind myself that rarely are decisions perfect. Either way, you gain some things and give up others. My friends who have kids in school have their own likes and dislikes about their choice. It comes down to what makes the most sense for our own family at each point in our lives, and on which path we believe God has called us to follow.

I want to stay on this one a bit longer to see where it leads.

If God wants me to switch paths somewhere down the road, I'm hoping He will make it obvious.


Two roads diverged in a wood, and I —
I took the 'one less traveled' by,
And that has made all the difference. - Robert Frost

Trying this again...

I know it looks as if I've been neglecting this lovely little corner of cyberspace, but it was all part of my devious plan to trick all three of the people who had been reading my blog into thinking it was defunct and go away.

Now that they're gone, I will resume my research on the tribe of Savages with whom I seem to be permanently stuck.

Surveying my surroundings:

It's a good-sized dwelling, but it contains an oppressive amount of clutter. I recently started a clutter-awareness campaign, despite the protests of the Savages, and I do think I've made some progress in clearing out key areas of the dewlling. Of course, all the junk wound up in the basement, which is now a complete disaster. If the junk isn't removed from the dwelling permanently soon, I can guarantee that it will slowly but surely work its way back into the rooms I worked so hard to clear out. Such is the nature of my work.

As for the Savages themselves:

They are all male, as far as I can tell. The oldest one is kind of cute, roughly my age, and I have accepted him as a mate. We bunk together and occasionally get some time without the smaller ones around, but not much. He does a lot of crossword puzzles, and he has a talent for making me laugh and taking over with the care of the younger ones when I've had it with them.

The biggest Savage child is taller than me, but only 12 years old. He is the "squeaky wheel" of the group who has the most demands, needs the most attention, and does the most damage. He frequently takes his pubescent angst out on his guitar. He's getting to be pretty good at that guitar. This is good since, despite his genius IQ, he doesn't seem too interested in schoolwork.

The middle child is 9 and is frequently described as an "old soul." He is wise and perceptive, strongly motivated to learn and achieve, and quick to remind us of the forest when all we are seeing is the trees. We have noticed that he is growing his hair long, but we don't bother him about it. He's a good kid, not mean or rebellious or disrespectful. If he's growing his hair, it must be for a good reason.

The littlest one is 5 and very cute. Everyone still calls him "the baby," although this isn't really accurate. He's actually a kitty. Ask him and he will tell you about how he's a special kitty because he has "opposable thumbs." Or he will just meow at you if he doesn't know you well. He's been a kitty for 2 or three years now. We wonder how this is affecting his brain development, but he seems pretty smart, he gets along with the other children, and he fears nothing, so we're just chalking it up to an active imagination.

Then there's the dog. Another male, of course. He provides hours of entertainment for the tribe as they chase him around, put clothing on him, and "talk" like they imagine he would talk. I'm thankful that he can't really talk because I'd be afraid to hear what he'd say, and because it's already noisy enough around here.

It's a very busy tribe, with some kind of schooling or activity going on from the time we get up to the time we collapse from exhaustion at the end of the day. Savageman goes to work early in the morning, and I try to get up before the others do for some uberproductivity time, but the littlest one has superhuman (kitty) hearing and wakes up and finds me before I have a chance to get anything done.

The biggest one is up next, armed with reasons and excuses why he shouldn't have to learn anything from me today, or at least right now. He avoids me as best as he can for as long as he can, pretending he's eating breakfast for three hours.

Finally, the middle one, who is wise enough to realize the power of adequate sleep (or maybe he's wise because he's the only one of us who gets adequate sleep - I'm not sure which) emerges from his room, looking like a bedraggled sea monster with the hair sticking up every which way. He prefers to skip breakfast like I do, which is fine because it won't be long now until lunch. His Savage brothers yell, "AAAAAAgggghhh! A sea monster!" And he waves his tentacles in the air and scampers back up the stairs to get dressed and comb his hair.

The rest of the day is spent engaging in a variety of activities, from math and history and science, to field trips and activities, sports and scouts and martial arts. When we finally reach the end of the day, it feels like I've only done half of what I had planned to get done that day, but again, such is the nature of my work.

Overall, it's not a bad place to be stuck. I like it here.

New Pictures

Maroon and Orange Tears

When you go to Tech, it’s in your blood. I think of the kind of camaraderie and the pride -- they call it “hokie pride.” It sounds corny, but it is how proud the students are of their school.

I never imagined that this is the way Virginia Tech would likely go down in history. I know everyone says that about their town: “Not my town, my town is a little town,” or “It would never happen in my neighborhood.”

But Virginia Tech is a place away from the big cities. It is away from the big city problems, away from all of it. It felt insulated. It felt safe. I never felt uncomfortable walking on that campus.

Then to hear what happened at Tech today, at my school. I couldn’t believe it—I still can’t.

-Hoda Kotb, Dateline correspondent and Virginia Tech graduate

I really don't know what else I can add to this, other than to say that the five years I spent in Blacksburg, VA were happy ones. This was where we lived when we started our married life together, where we had our first child, and where I worked as both a teacher and a grad student in the VA Tech Psychology Department.

Blacksburg always struck me as being a little utopia - a place hidden from the rest of the world, tucked away in the Blue Ridge Mountains, populated mainly by other young adults and professors. We lived very well on very little money, spent lots of time with friends and enjoyed the scenic beauty of the campus and the surrounding wilderness. I missed it terribly when we first moved away, but I had forgotten how much until now.

I am so sad, of course for the victims and their families, but also for my school, a beautiful place that does not deserve this legacy.

Some 2007 Pictures

Just in case you are a friend or family member who hasn't seen the little Savages recently, here's a recap of what Uno, Dos & Tres been doing since Christmas:



Tres still loves to pretend he's a kitty. We have found pictures of him doing this kind of thing as an infant, leading us to believe that he really was a kitty in a previous lifetime.


He and the mailman are great friends, as you can see by the way the mailman just turned complete control over his truck to him.


Uno and Dos displaying their Pinewood Derby cars. This was Uno's 5th and final Pinewood Derby and he came in second, which was very exciting for him. Dos didn't do as well, but last year, he won the "Most Creative" award for his car cut and painted to look like a #2 pencil.


Dos and Rocky sleeping in front of the fireplace.


Uno after receiving the Arrow of Light award, marking the end of his time as a Cub Scout and the start of life as a Boy Scout.


Dos, now promoted to the rank of Bear Cub.


Dos has his own blog now. If you'd like to experience his wacky literary talents for yourself, check out the "Smeethan's World" link on the right. Leave him a comment so he knows he's had visitors!

Early Morning Life

Has it been three weeks yet? Maybe I'm finally getting used to this early morning stuff. Today I woke up before the alarm went off, and when I woke up late a few days ago, it really did feel weird, like part of the day was over and I had missed it.

What am I doing with all of this quiet time in the morning? Messing around on the computer, of course, but also getting those little projects done around the house that are always so difficult once everyone else is up. Like filing pictures, sorting mail, reorganizing the basement, restocking the dog food bin, starting a new batch of ginger soda, etc. Avoiding working on the novel, which always makes me more productive in other areas. Once the garden is planted, I am looking forward to time fussing over the little plants. I'm sharing the garden with two friends this year, so I have to actually take care of it and pull a few weeds this time around!

I've considered starting the day with some yoga, but I'm still wearing jeans, which are too constricting for yoga. And I don't want to have to get dressed twice. Weird, I know, but soon it will be shorts season and it won't be an issue. Once it's really hot, this will be a nice time to take a walk.

I'm going to have to start getting up at 6 to fit all of this me-time in!

Today's project: Making more doggie treats.

They're cheap, they're natural and the dog loves them. (The kids have been known to try a few also.) Here's the recipe:


Rocky's Rockin' Biscuits

2 cups whole wheat or all purpose flour
1 cup cornmeal
2 teaspoon beef bouillon powder
1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
1 egg
1 T oil
1 cup hot water

Mix above ingredients in a medium bowl.

Stir well. Roll out on a well-floured surface to 1/2 inch thickness. Cut into shapes. We like squares, triangles, rectangles and circles, but little people shapes are also fun. Place on an ungreased cooking sheet. Bake on center rack @ 275 F. for about 2 hours until dry and very hard. Leave them out overnight to get dry and crunchy.

What Would Ben Say?

I am wrapping up the second week of taking Mr. Franklin's advice and all I can say is...

I'm tired.

Sure, I am starting to habituate to waking in the middle of the night, and have even worked my way to (gasp) 7:15. And although the first minute or two still feels like pure hell, I have to remind myself that getting up after one or more of the little Savages wasn't too great either. At least this pure hell doesn't involve a massive clean-up effort. I definitely enjoy having some quiet time each morning to get my head on straight (drink coffee) and organize myself before I face the non-stop craziness that comes with educating the little Savages. This part alone makes it worth getting to bed by 11:30 (okay, 12:00, but I'm working on it.)

So, score one point for Ben. I'm still not thrilled with his method, but I think I can get there in another week or two. Eventually, it will actually feel normal to see the sun rising and weird to wake up when it's already light out. In theory, anyway.

Having reluctantly accepted Ben's method in this regard, I am now being forced to deal with the question of his education. Benjamin Franklin was almost completely self-educated.

As my oldest son wishes to be.

Not that Ben necessarily had a choice in the matter - I believe his reason for leaving school to apprentice in his brother's print shop was lack of funds. But it seems to have worked out for him pretty well, or so I am oft reminded.

"Benjamin Franklin was also a highly motivated, hard working individual," I point out. "I have not been seeing these same qualities in you, my friend."

"Well, maybe if I actually liked what I was learning, I would be."

Has he been reading Gatto again?

This time, maybe he has. When I forced him to write an editorial this week, he did not hesitate to choose his topic - Unschooling. "Kids should be able to choose their topics of interest and the environment they work best in," he wrote.

Dangling participle aside, I had to admire the kid for choosing a topic close to his heart. He read up on it, outlined, and wrote up a draft with minimal teeth-pulling or assistance from me.

When I praised his effort, he grinned. "So, will you consider it?"

What would Ben say?

It's a tough call, and I do feel torn on the issue.

I mean, this is isn't just fun and games here. This is his education we're talking about.

This is his education.

Funny how where you put the italics can really change your whole mindset.

On the one hand, I think about how I would have liked learning at that age. There's more of me in him than I like to admit, and I do know and understand how he feels, as much as he might doubt that.

I have read the Gattos and the Holts and Growing Without Schooling and all the stuff out there that reassures fearful parents that yes, they really do learn, even when you don't force them to do it, and in the long run, they are better off.

I remember how, in our first year of cyberschooling, he spent months enthusiastically collecting information on the Apollo moon missions and came away knowing more about the space program than did most adults. I didn't force him to learn that - he did that all on his own, because he wanted to.

Where is that passionate, curious, knowledge-hungry little person now?

Have five years of following a set curriculum, fighting over the fact that it's time to do math, hearing me say put that guitar away and get to work on your paper, followed up with, come on, you can do better than this - have all these things done what I was afraid school would do to him?

A lot of people would say yes.

I humbly admit that, despite his reassuringly high scores on the standardized tests, I have not done the job I had hoped to do with him. He might know the answers, but he doesn't care anymore.

The questions are not his own.

I listened to my fears: that there might be gaps in his knowledge or skills, that he might not learn good work habits, that he would grow up thinking he was entitled to only do what he felt like doing at the moment, that he would eventually get to school and be behind instead of ahead, that he would never get into a good college or have a good job and that it would reflect poorly on my job as his teacher.

I know that it is his life and he has to learn to make his own good choices and deal with the natural consequences when he does not. I know that he would learn better with material that he has chosen and wants to master and when his power-struggle with me is no longer his primary focus. I know that my current method of do it because it's in the curriculum is not giving me the results for which I had hoped. Fighting over schoolwork has done nothing to foster a love of learning in him.

I know this, but it is still so hard.

Let's face it - letting go of the control over your child's education is a huge leap of faith. Most people take a version of this leap when they send the child to school. They let go and trust the teachers and administration into whose hands they have placed their precious offspring to do at least an adequate job.

But to trust the offspring himself? (shudder)

I must admit, they have all been very industrious this week without me chasing them down to "do school." Usually, I use spring break as a time to catch up in areas where we're behind. This time, as an experiment, I didn't ask them to do a thing. (No TV, of course.) It was nice to see that spark of creative genius return to Uno's eye, and Dos was not far behind. When they weren't reading, they were listening to audio books, and they played a lot of music and baseball, constructed and painted some impressive-looking swords out of PVC pipe and other found items, wrote up a plan to make and sell more dog treats at the neighborhood yard sale this month, and generally got along with each other.

Is this what true homeschoolers do?

What would Ben say?

Rising Early

"Early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise." - Benjamin Franklin

"But I'm a woman and I'm sleeping in."

This was my (smartass) response when some parental authority from my youth first imparted Mr. Franklin's wisdom to me. And, true to my word, I have been a night-owl my entire life. In grade school, I read by the light of my electric blanket into the wee hours when the folks confiscated my flashlight. In college, I chose my classes based on what was available after 12 p.m. I met and befriended Savageman because we were the only two freshmen who decided to stay up all night at the new student retreat, and I wound up dating and eventually marrying him because he was the only other person on campus awake as late as I on a regular basis. There was a joke among our dorm-mates that we were actually vampires, since they so rarely saw us during sunlight hours. In the two years we lived on campus, we made it to breakfast a few times, but only because we had pulled all-nighters and hadn't yet gone to bed. Yes, Savageman and I elevated night-owlishness to a new art form.

You would think that parenthood would have changed all of that, but it didn't. My graduate school schedule closely resembled my undergraduate schedule, and by the time Uno was born, I was done with my coursework and just needed to put in an appearance here and there in the department. Baby Uno and I would nap and nurse until noon. Savageman worked evenings, so he slept in with us too.

Even after Savageman started working regular hours, I still managed to sleep late with the kids. One of the joys of homeschooling is that there's no bus to catch. We started school whenever everyone was up and dressed, and if that wasn't until lunchtime, so be it.

Part of the reason we've maintained this lifestyle is that when the little Savages are in bed, our grown-up time begins. We clean up the house, watch a movie, read, relax, etc. We enjoy this time. A lot. We want it to last as long as possible. Sometimes, we make it last until 1 or 2 in the morning.

But all of that is about to change. I have made a life-changing decision.

I will become an early riser.

I have read up on the benefits of waking with the sun, and I am convinced that this is a good thing. I have also read that if you can do something consistently for 21 days, it will become a habit.

So, last night I dug my old alarm clock out and set it up. Across the room.

This morning, it went off at the ungodly hour of 7:30. I stumbled out of bed, turned it off, and fought the (powerful) urge to crawl back into my warm, cozy bed. I staggered into the bathroom. The first minute or two were awful and all I could think about was how good it would feel to get back in bed for another hour or two of sleep. But once my teeth were clean and my eyes had begun to focus, I began to feel normal. I could pretend I had actually had a full night's sleep and it wasn't really still the middle of the night.

I came downstairs, made coffee, unloaded the dishwasher, and prepared for my day. I sorted a year's worth of pictures and put them in albums. By the time everyone else was awake, I was feeling refreshed and energized.

Savageman warned me that at some point, I would hit the wall. Sure enough, by 5:30 or so, I was ready to crash. Thank God for Starbucks. Venti.

So now it's 10:30 p.m. The little Savages are finally in bed and I have an hour to cram in 3 hours of grown-up time. Instead of a 2.5 hour DVD, we'll have to watch a 30 minute sitcom. Instead of a chapter or two of a novel, it's a magazine article. Sigh...

The trade-off is that tomorrow morning I will have an hour of peace and quiet before the little Savages descend upon me. I can sip my coffee and finish my photo albums in peace.

Tomorrow, the alarm goes off at 7:20.

A Day At the Beach

Actually, we were there a week.

Every September, my most WONDERFUL parents rent a house for us all in the Outer Banks of North Carolina. It is, most definitely, the highlight of our year.

You may be wondering why we plan our NC vacation for September every year, considering this is the peak month for hurricane activity in the region. To this I say, Bah! We live on the edge! The added dimension of excitement and suspense as we watch the Weather Channel in the weeks leading up to the trip just make it that much more fun. And every year, except one - we have hit it just right.

This year was no exception. A week after Ernesto, the roads had a bit of water on them, but we had beautiful weather all week long.
There was a little rain on Wednesday, but that's the day to visit the lighthouse and the nature center and go shopping anyway. And you never know - you could go to the beach in July and get a week of rain just as easily as in September.

The best part about going in September is that we have the place practically to ourselves. Most everyone else is back to school by now, so we cyberschoolers need only pack up our laptop and a few books and go! The kids didn't do a lot of work, but enough to keep them legal. Uno had a whole science unit on Oceans this year, so we immersed ourselves (literally) in waves and tides and marine life.

This was the first year that we've had a dog to bring along. Rocky wasn't too sure of the ocean at first, but he sure loved chasing those birds! Every day, he got a little bolder, and by his last visit to the water, he was jumping through the (smaller) waves and digging up crabs to eat. When he didn't come with us to the beach, he lounged by the pool or relaxed in the house.

Considering we chose a large pointer instead of a small, cuddly lap dog, we were expecting Rocky to be some kind of great Adventure Dog.
When he didn't dive happily in the ocean right away like the other Adventure Dogs on the beach, we decided to try him out in the relative calm and safety of the pool at the house. I guess no one told Rocky that his breed was designed to swim - he did not like the pool one bit. We tried to coax him in a few times, but he never did (voluntarily) get wet.

The house itself was great! This was our first year in this particular house, but I'm sure we will choose it again. It was just over the dunes from the beach, it had a pool and hot tub, and plenty of space for everyone. It was so relaxing. My parents really helped out a lot with the kids (including taking them in their van 8+ hours each way) so Savageman and I got to spend time alone for a change. We didn't bring much stuff with us, so there was hardly anything to clean. And my Dad loves to cook, so he took care of all the shopping and meals for the week.

There was a loft overlooking the living room that was the perfect base of operations for me, my computer and my yoga stuff. I planned the science courses I am teaching at the homeschool co-op this semester and designed for myself a mini-course in writing fiction. I also finished reading a whole novel, listened to another in the car, and bought another at Beach Bag Books and Music, a wonderful little place in Corolla where Sara and Ken, the owners, on separate occasions chatted with us about favorite books and music. Their gigantic Newfoundland, Finnegan, lounged at Sara's feet. Savageman bought several local interest books about the Outer Banks.


Then came the highlight of the trip for Savageman - he and I took his truck off-road and drove up the beach to the North Carolina / Virginia border.
There, we saw some wild ponies and we wandered in search of a special monument he had researched extensively.

"What is this fabulous monument we drove all the way out here to see?" I queried, thinking it must be something really special, considering the effort we were putting into the search. A fallen Civil War hero, a famous discovery, or an old shipwreck, for example.

"It marks the border of North Carolina and Virginia," he replied.

"Oh." Whoopie.

Although we never did find the #$%^&$! memorial honoring the most excellent NC/VA border, we did have a good adventure following the wild ponies. And driving on the beach itself is always fun, although I'm not really sure why.

Playing on the beach was great too. Savageman dug his traditional hole, although this time, he dug it too far up and it never did fill with water at high tide as in previous years. He had a good time sitting in it, though.

We all really liked boogie-boarding this year, especially my parents!
We could go out to where the water was fairly deep and dive under the waves, then go a bit further out and suddenly we would be standing on a sandbar and the water would be knee deep again. Boogie-boarding at the sandbar was even better, and we spent hours at it.


We took several cute pictures of the kids, one of which will wind up on our Christmas card this year. Probably the only stressful time on the trip was trying to get the 3 kids and 1 dog to stand still and smile while I was losing the light I wanted. Oh well, we may end up using the one of them in the tree anyway.


This year, we were sadder than ever to have to leave. It was a perfect week, and it already seems like so long ago. Only 50 more weeks to go until we can go back...