Birthday Night Out

Our much-anticipated bar tour started with drinks and gifts at the Brewhouse in Camp Hill.

From there, we headed over to the Camp Hill Appalachian Brewing Company where we ate.

Lost a few members and picked up a few more, then headed out to the West Shore Hardware Bar for dancing.

Good dancing photos are so hard to get - but this one wasn't bad... Dancing Fools, we were...

Glad that Savageman drove and stayed until the end.  So much more fun with him along.




NaNoWriMo update: 10017 words!  1/5 done.  :-)

Still Writing

So my main character had a really wordy anxiety attack and I managed to get to 6661 words - right on target for the night. 

Then today, I pushed through to 8461 - slightly ahead of where I need to be, which is just how I'm liking it. 

And none of my characters even had to start reading aloud from the dictionary.

Such a new thing for me, to actually be more and more ahead each day instead of more and more behind.  According to my stats, I now only have to write 1598 words per day to finish on time.  Which really doesn't take much time now that the Inner Editor is locked up tightly in a box in the back corner of the storage room in the back corner of the basement.  Haven't heard a peep out of her and I'm liking that too. 

:-)

The rest of my day will likely revolve around driving Middle and his Ninja friends from the mall to wherever else they want to go and then back to their houses so that the adult Ninja and their spouses can go out for an evening of eating, drinking, dancing, and general merriment.

After which I will come home and read The Paris Wife until I fall asleep.  Because not only is it NaNoWriMo and NaBloPoMo month, I have Book Club in a few weeks and I think everyone is reading or has read the book for a change. 

Gotta love November. 

:-D

I Have a Lot of Writing to Do

... so I've got to be quick here.

Spent the day cleaning, teaching and being Responsible.

Spent the evening kicking and punching and hanging out at the pizza joint with the karate peeps. One of my bestest karate buddies has put together this amazing bar tour / dancing night to celebrate my birthday tomorrow with a jillion of our karate friends, complete with little printout reminders of which bar we intend to hit at which time.

Never mind the fact that my birthday was last month and I've already forgotten about it - I think we all just really needed a night out and this is the excuse.

But I'll take it. :-)

And serious props to my friend for all the work she put into the planning and inviting and printing and designating drivers - all while she's been working, moving, fixing up two houses (one to sell, one to live in) and coming in for karate every night. She's the busiest working mother of three that I know, and she's made this night out a huge priority.

So big smoochy smooches to my pal who's making me feel way special right now - I'm secretly planning how to return the favor for her in June.

And now I need to write about 2000 words to get back on NaNoWriMo track. And it's 11:25 PM.

Hope something REALLY interesting happens in my story tonight.

Childbirth Blues

I wrapped up another Bradley childbirth class tonight.

The last class is always bittersweet.  I've spent 10-12 weeks with these couples, getting to know them, their backgrounds, their hopes, their fears, answering their questions, coaching them along and teaching them to be coaches for each other.  I've watched friendships grow and develop between the couples - friendships that often continue after their babies arrive, since they have that all-consuming mutual experience of New Parenthood in common. 

Tonight I said goodbye to them. 

Two of the couples have already had their babies, and one was there with their newborn tonight, which was great for the others to see.  We talked about what to expect, the joys, the frustrations, the bonding, the feeding, the sleeping, the swaddling...

The theme has shifted from the birth itself, which I reminded them will only be a few hours, to Parenthood, which is the whole rest of their lives.

They will never be the same.

Feeling so honored to have been a part of this transition in the lives of these special people.  They're going to be wonderful parents.

Here's Something New...

I'm actually ahead in my word count for probably the first time ever.  And the little stats window on the NaNoWriMo page tells me I now need 1600 words per day to finish on time instead of the traditional 1667.  Very gratifying.

It was actually an extremely productive day all around.  I'm always uber-productive when I'm procrastinating.

We got a ton of schoolwork done, I actually prepared good food, had a beautiful walk and visit with a friend, spent three hours at the dojang, took a trip to the grocery store with Middle on the way home, and then sat down and wrote 4 pages.  Which is pretty much what I need to stay ahead.

Four pages isn't so bad.  Although my back aches from sitting at the desk - or maybe it was the emphasis on falls tonight during class. 

I have no fear of falling, I just hate hitting the mat.

You were warned, remember?

And while I did procrastinate, fully enjoying all the uber-productivity that happened as a result, I didn't stress over the writing itself.  I just did it.  Didn't worry about whether it was good or bad, whether I chose the right word here or there, whether I'd ever be able to show it to anyone... I just wrote it and enjoyed the process.

It's okay if it sucks.  It's a first draft of a first novel.  I have realistic expectations of it, and of myself. 

If I can teach my kids to be this loving and accepting of themselves in life, they may not be fantabulous, but they'll probably be happy.

Maybe even both.

Literary Abandon

Thinking about thinking today.

And how sometimes less is more.

Something in the article I read yesterday reminded me of something I hear all too often from my karate instructors.  Don't think.

In martial arts, we call it mushin. 

FightingArts.com describes it like this:

"A Zen term referring to that state of mental clarity and enhanced perception (sensory and intuitive) known as pure mind, produced by the absence of conscious thought, ideas, judgments, emotion (fear and anxiety), pre-conception, or self-consciousness. A product of Zen meditative training. For the warrior, meditation (towards mushin) was an important compliment to technical training. Through mushin the mind is not absent, but instead is freed. No longer inhibited, slowed, distracted, or clogged the mind was free to fully perceive, respond and commit to action. The mind is not fixed on anything and is open to everything; a mind expanded through the whole body with total awareness of and focus on everything."

One instructor in particular has been working with me on this when we're sparring.  She'll start out nice and slow, and I'll be thinking about strategy, analyzing what she's doing, looking for patterns, remembering new techniques I want to try... and getting my butt kicked. 

"You're thinking too much.  Cut it out."

She picks up the pace.  Suddenly I'm overwhelmed.  Kicks and punches are coming too fast for me to do anything but block and counter, block and counter.  I want it to stop, but I have no choice but to keep fighting.

And then something happens.  Maybe the adrenaline kicks in, maybe one part of my brain shuts off while another part clicks on, maybe I just reach the point at which I give up control and just surrender to instinct.  But I start to fight, and I start to fight well.

According to her, that is. 

I have no idea of how I'm doing because I'm no longer thinking, not assessing or planning.  I'm in The Zone and some part of my awareness is hearing her saying, "Now you're fighting!  Much better.  Keep it up.  Don't think."

Much like the surrender and relaxation techniques I teach my childbirth students, it seems counterintuitive.  But the more you feel it working, the more you want to do it, and the easier it comes. 

The question is, can I take that same state of mushin and apply it to my writing? 

I wonder if there's a program out there which could force me to type faster than I think...

Halloween 2011

The phone / internet came back on today.

Spooky.  It was a Halloween Miracle.

Today was indeed Halloween, but in our part of the world, we Trick-or-Treat the Thursday before, just to be weird. 

Anyway, I saved the picture for the actual holiday:



Middle, Little, and their Ninja Buddies

It was really hard getting this picture - the rest were blurry streaks of excited children running from house to house.  Thankfully, the man with the bowl of candy at this particular house (perhaps taking pity on the flustered parents with cameras) required them all to line up in an orderly fashion, so I seized the moment. 

They had quite the wacky fun time.  Of course, the best part was sitting around the living room trading the candy with each other afterwards.  Which I missed because I was teaching my childbirth class, but I heard it was fun.

Good, sugary fun.

And now that October is drawing to a close, I'm gearing up for NaNoWriMo and NaBloPoMo.  Hoping to keep my fingers extra busy this month, especially since I finally fired the Inner Editor and Other Critical Voices with the tail end of this fall's Life Purge.  There could be oodles of crappy writing, especially with no one doing quality control, so if you don't enjoy crappy writing, (or reading about my life in general), I advise you to STAY AWAY because the innmates are now running the asylum. 

Consider yourselves warned.

WhoooHaaaaHaaaaHaaaaHaaaaHaaa!

>:-)

Halloween Snow Weekend Continued

So last night our phone went out.

And of course, with the phone went the DSL.

Verizon tells us they will be happy to send a service tech out November 9th.

*!*

So here I am, at my parents' house, checking my email and taking care of all my other online business.  We lost phone service for a week during the last big storm, and I didn't have a smart phone then, so this time should be a bit easier. 

But still.

NaNoWriMo and NaBloPoMo start in 2 days.  Granted, I don't need internet to work on NaNoWriMo.  As a matter of fact, the distraction might be a hinderance.  NaBloPoMo is another story, but there are opportunities to sign up for that every month now, so it's not as big a deal.  I guess I can blog about how badly NaNoWriMo is going from my phone or my parents' for the first part of November if I really want to do that.

Which begs the question, "Why am I doing this again?"  Every year I try, and every year I crash and burn at the Write-A-Novel-In-A-Month challenge. 

It's probably something to do with the mentality I learned doing martial arts: as long as I keep showing up and doing my best, whatever my best might look like on that particular day, I'm going to improve more than if I had just stayed at home.  You can apply that same philosophy to pretty much everything - maybe it goes for writing too.  God knows I spend enough time writing every day, whether the end result is something I publish or something I leave as a draft.  Being comfortable with the fact that first drafts, especially ones thrown down in 30 days, are supposed to suck, is part of the challenge, part of the fun. 

It's an exercise in muzzling my Inner Editor and other Critical Voices and just running around barefoot in my imagination, allowing myself to totally suck - and still feeling good about who I am and the fact that I keep showing up to give it my best shot.

It's therapy for a brain that spent decades being paralyzed by perfectionism, being far too self-critical and sensitive to the disapproval of others.

Screw it all, I say.

I love my sucky writing, and I love that once a year I can attempt to churn out vast quantities of it for an entire month.

Curling up tonight with my copy of No Plot? No Problem! and a big goofy grin on my face.

:-)

Halloween Snow Weekend

Okay, this is just weird.
 

Back porch.  Taken earlier today.

A few days ago, it was about 70 and beautiful. Now it's snowing. It's been snowing all day and there's probably 6 inches piled up out there.



"ROBUSTO!" says Savageman.

It was actually nice to have a snow day.  I made Italian Fall Soup with Collards from the CSA newsletter, and Little and I made butter & maple syrup snow candy.

Maple snow taffy

Little built us a fire and spent much of the day outside in the snow with his buddies, and Savageman and I got some house projects done.  The Teen was at work for a large part of the day, and Middle spent the day at an indoor skate park riding his rip stick.

Little's Fire

So far, we still have power, although I understand several thousand people in our county do not.  Heavy snow falling on trees that still have leaves is supposedly a big problem for power lines.  Keeping our fingers crossed and our candles handy.

After we get Middle from the skate park, the plan is to hunker down and watch a movie.  But if we lose power, at least we have this nice fire and several organized, decluttered shelves of board games we can play together. 

Snow in October.

Weird, yes.  But not too awful.

Friday Night Mixing Bowl

Friday night is sparring night at our karate school. 

The kids have the first hour, taking turns sparring in a ring with judges, going for points like they would in a tournament.  They wear protective gear and there are very specific rules regarding where and how hard they can hit.

The second hour + is for the adults and teens, who pair up and spar continuously, without judges, wearing minimal gear and switching partners every 15-20 minutes or so until we've had at least 4 fights each.  Courtesy rules apply as always, but beyond that, anything goes.  "Kick and punch him and try not to let him kick and punch you," were my instructions when I began.  Depending on who you pair with, you could be in for a gentle talk-and-tap with a friend, or an adrenaline-spiking, sweat-drenching, "holy-crap-I'm-dead-meat" serious fight with an adversary who will hit you hard if you don't protect yourself. 

A good night for me has some of each.

Afterward, we shake hands, hug, pat each other on the back...

and go out for pizza.

Our school almost completely takes over the pizza joint every Friday.  People of all different ages, fitness levels, socioeconomic statuses, educational backgrounds, belief systems, employment histories, cultural backgrounds, political persuasions,  etc. sit down and eat and talk and have a great time.  In most cases, the only thing they have in common is the karate school. They are either karate people or are parents, siblings, or spouses of karate people.

It's like a big family dinner every week, with the adults at one big table and the kids piling into several booths, playing silly word games, sitting on each other, looking at each other's electronic devices, and eventually heading outside to skateboard or ripstick, loiter at the Big Lots, or walk to the Cinema Center for a movie. 

Tonight, the teens and tweens saw a movie, so it was calmer than usual - until they got back.

Friday night facebook will often feature silly pictures they took at the restaurant or in the movie theater with their phones.  They're already starting to trickle into my news feed.

The adult table is quite lively as well.  Conversational topics vary widely and wildly.  There's a lot of laughter.  Everyone is kind and relaxed, open and friendly.

Even the normally reclusive Savageman will come out for Friday night pizza, and he'll do it even on nights when I have another commitment and can't be there myself.  Which says a lot.  It used to be weird, knowing he was there hanging out with my friends while I was at book club or away camping or whatever, but now they're just as much his friends as they are mine.  Which makes me very happy.

When I think about the fact that family dinner at our house happens in shifts, that we stand in the kitchen and munch, sometimes together, sometimes not, I realize how far we've drifted from the evening ritual I had wanted for us.  Karate and our other sports have made sit-down family meals all but impossible for years now. 

But we always have Sunday dinners at my parents' house, and we have Friday dinners with the karate family.  Rituals we can count on, that we look forward to, that make us feel warm and happy and connected.

Celebrating a birthday with one of Little's homemade cakes.

It's not a bad trade-off.

42

I had a really good birthday.

The day started with coffee and a treat with a homeschooling friend, followed by morning martial arts class.  Middle and I had a good workout and also learned something called a 15 Lock Drill where we used pressure points and joint manipulation on the arms, wrists and fingers in 15 different ways, some more creative (and more painful) than others.  I'm happy to report that he's been gung-ho to practice this new skill every chance he gets.  "Grab my arm, mom."  Sigh.  The good news is that when you don't push these techniques all the way to the point of real pain, it gives everything a great stretch. 

As we crossed the creek on the way home, it hit me that it was a beautiful day and I had really wanted to spend it on the water.  My Craigslist kayak deal had fallen through, and I felt a pang of sadness that today would not be the day to put my new kayak in the water as I had originally planned.

I remembered that a good homeschooling / martial arts friend who lives across the creek from me had offered the use of her 3 kayaks whenever we wanted to use them.  I called her.

Not only was she willing to loan them, she drove us up the road a ways to a good put-in and we spent the next 90 minutes or so exploring the Conodoguinet as we traveled back to her house. 

Awesome time. Beautiful day.

I came home On Top Of the World. Did some tidying up, flushed the toilet in the boys' bathroom (because they're always forgetting) and took a minute to check some stuff on the computer. Took an online punch to the chest* and watched as yucky water poured out of the light fixture above the kitchen sink at the exact same moment. Scrambled to deal with both.  Shit happens. 

Regrouped and headed back to the dojang for two more hours of class and kickboxing. 

Came home feeling pleasantly exhausted, changed and headed out for dinner and beers with part of the dojang crowd who will be out of town the night we had actually planned to celebrate and go dancing. Savageman got the kids settled in and came out too, which was great.

Collapsed into bed after midnight, having truly experienced a full day.



*As for the online punch:  It was brought to my attention in a rather painful way that my last post, in which I mentioned a past relationship, was viewed by that person and it upset her.  Seeing it through her eyes, I understood why, and I was sorry to have hurt her.  It wasn't intended to do that, merely to remind myself of some conclusions I'd reached after a great deal of processing.  All I can say is that when a relationship ends, you can dwell on the things you miss, or you can focus on reasons it worked out for the best.  I've spent plenty of time doing the former, and now I've moved on to the latter.

I'm sure she could think of similar things about me that she has missed and things she's glad to be done with.  For her, the cons outweighed the pros of continuing our friendship. 

Sometimes, the best way to love someone is to let her go when she asks you to.

Birthday Thoughts

A good friend cornered me at the dojang last week and reminded me that my birthday is coming up and we need to pick a night to celebrate.

It's true. I'm turning 42 in a few days.

42 isn't a bad number. The shock of "Omigod I'm turning 40 and my life is almost half over and what have I really got to show for it" has worn off. As has the accompanying mid-life crisis.

To some extent, anyway.

If there's one thing I've learned in the last two or three years of rediscovering myself, it's that your true friends stand by you and encourage you, no matter what. They love you, support you, cheer for you and celebrate with you. They take pleasure in seeing you happy and fulfilled and you do the same for them, regardless of where you are in your own journey in that particular area of life, whether it be career, parenting, marriage, fitness, household management... whatever.

I've been fortunate enough this last year or so to be surrounded by people who are as comfortable with their own strengths and weaknesses as I am with mine. We all want to see each other succeed in our endeavors, and if one of us makes a forward leap, it's inspiration and encouragement for the others, not a cause for hurt or envy. Such a contrast from the days when I could expect anger and resentment for taking positive steps in my marriage, continuing to homeschool my kids, working at getting physically fit, enjoying time with my other friends, or even investing money in fixing up my home.

I've also learned that believing you can love and nurture someone out of her anger and defensiveness is naive. The energy spent managing such a relationship while still attempting forward progress of your own makes for a very difficult and conflict-ridden time.  Just because you believe in and encourage the dreams and goals of another person doesn't mean she will do the same for you.  A heartbreaking lesson to learn, but a valuable one all the same.

And I'm writing this down because it's important for me to remember as I move forward post-purge with a deeper appreciation of the friends I've reconnected with.  So grateful for people who cheer each other on, rejoice in each other's successes, and support and encourage each other through life's challenges.  My life would be so different without them.

Looking forward to celebrating another birthday with my newly refinished, uncluttered home  - and heart.

Another year older = another year wiser.

One Week

It's been a week since the floor project ended.

For me, anyway.  Savageman continued dealing with it, and the designer, etc. over the weekend, but I was doing martial arts stuff - including a national tournament in Baltimore where Middle took 2nd in Weapons Forms and 1st in Fighting.  His whole team did great - 6 competitors, 7 firsts in their various events and levels.  A great day overall.

Great for me to get away too.  After weeks and weeks of having the house torn up, working morning until night on the cleaning and decluttering effort, having people in the house, not being free to come and go as needed, sending the kids to my parents' house to get their schoolwork done, missing martial arts classes - I feel like I'm coming out of a fog and seeing my life again.  When I walked into the dojang on Monday, one of my friends commented right away, "You are absolutely glowing.  Everything about you looks different.  It's like a huge weight has been lifted."

How right she was.

There's more to be done, of course - there always will be.  But I've been doing it on my own, a little at a time.  Hanging curtains, replacing cabinet hinges, shopping for appliances and furniture, caulking and painting, looking at staircase ideas, cleaning and decluttering.  I've managed to keep the main floor clean this week, thanks to all the storage that we've freed up in the basement.  Two new storage pieces in the dining room and a wall of shelves in the living room will help even more. 

But we're taking our time with all that. 

In addition to reclaiming the house, I've also made an effort to reconnect with the other people in my life this week.  Lots of time with the karate friends, a long walk with my very good non-karate friend, book club tonight to kick off my birthday weekend.

It's important to me, this social time.  Going too long without it makes me wiggy.  I'm blessed with some very special friends, who took up a kayak collection for my birthday and put it in a homemade paper kayak.

So now I have no excuse.

After the month I've had, some sanity time paddling around on the creek sounds pretty darn good.

Progress:

Before

Little removing tack strips and staples from the subfloor



New paint, new underlayment and natural hickory hardwood

Little and Savageman removing old carpet and flooring

Brutal

No regrets, no looking back.

In the areas where we've worked this week, there is nothing left except those few things I could strongly justify keeping.  What I've saved for pure sentimental value is boxed up properly.  My storage areas are 3/4 empty.

And we're still not done.

As for the rest of the stuff that was cluttering up my house and constantly draining my energy?

I'm sitting here in my garage staring at it, hoping that people will give me money for it.  Half of my driveway is covered.

And right behind me is the trash.  Bags and bags and bags of it. 

I'm drained. 

Part of what makes this process so brutal - and it really has been brutal - isn't so much parting with the stuff.  It's stuff I wasn't using, wasn't missing, and in many cases didn't even know I had.  It's dealing with the fact that I ever let it get to this point in the first place.

Never. Again.

Ditto for the other things, people, thoughts and behaviors that distract me from the important things in my life, drain my tank, cause more hurt than happiness, lead to more frustration than enjoyment. 

I'm purging it all.  And this time, I'm being brutal about it.

Remembering how lovely my garden looked once I had yanked all the weeds.

Purging Purging Purging

I'm purging my life.

Purging my closets, purging my bookshelves, purging my basement, my kitchen, my bathrooms, my bedroom, my kids' toys, my storage areas, my old rugs and furniture.

Stuff I've held on to because I believed I still needed it - gone.

Stuff I've held on to because it was once precious to me - gone.

Stuff I've held on to because I hoped I might enjoy it again someday in the future - gone.

It's something I've needed to do for a long time, but I've been putting it off because I was afraid of making a mistake.

Now I realize that the real mistake was cluttering up my space, my attention, my life - with stuff that I don't need or want anymore.

It feels a little bit scary, all this purging, but it also feels

Positively

Exhilarating.

It's like weeding the garden but much more brutal. And, as with the garden, I know that after this initial investment of effort, future purges will be much, much easier. Once you clear out the weeds, it's easier to see the plants. And once the plants are allowed to grow and thrive, the weeds are easy to recognize for what they are and clear as they pop up.

Good things are coming, starting this week.  I am preparing to receive them with an uncluttered home and an open heart.

Quiet Morning, Quiet Fingers

It's a quiet morning.

Little is on the family room floor, enveloped in the blanket from his bed, playing with his Duplos and listening to the computer lessons on ancient Greece and Rome. That Dog is outside enjoying the sunshine and My Cat is sleeping on her back in a sunbeam, looking kind of silly with her paw covering her eyes. Middle is beginning to stir upstairs, and the Teen is halfway through his morning classes at school.

Plans are in the works for a Girls' Lunch Out with two of my favorite people at one of my favorite restaurants, so I'm happy to be getting the majority of Little's schoolwork out of the way this morning. Middle will work independently and review his work with me at the end of the day. Tonight he and I will do Kickboxing class together and then I will take Jung Sim Do class while he has Demo Team practice. He wants to compete at a NASKA tournament in NY this weekend, so he's been working especially hard.

Life is good. Things are calm and peaceful, both inside and out.

So I'm taking a few minutes to record it here because it's such a nice feeling.

My fingers have been quiet lately, not because I haven't had anything going on, but because much of my attention has been on the kids and their academic and social lives - not much that I would consider Blogworthy without violating their privacy.

As for me, the new routine of getting up at 6:40 a.m. to see the Teen off to school has knocked me off the coffee wagon. C'est la vie. Lovin' my morning coffee again. And my afternoon coffee, for that matter.

I didn't test for my green belt last weekend, choosing instead to take my time and make sure my yellow / stripe and green belt forms and techniques are more solid before moving ahead. At this point, there is a lot to memorize and keep track of, and my 41 year old brain needs frequent review and practice or the material quickly disappears, especially under pressure. Nothing challenges me physically and intellectually like this does, and for that I am grateful, despite the frustration I feel when I forget something or can't do it as well as I would like.

On the topic of physical challenges, I've been running more since the topic of the Philly Half Marathon came up. Monday I ran with a marathon-survivor friend and we did almost 4 miles - a new record for me. I find it a lot easier to run while conversing. Not sure if I will get anywhere close to 13 miles by the end of November, but it feels good to be building my endurance.

And it feels good to be moving my fingers again. I'll try to get back in the habit as time allows.

To Kate on her Birthday

We met 8 or 9 years ago.

A move-in La Leche League Leader (Leader Applicant?) with a toddler the same age as Middle and a small baby in your arms, a passion for attachment parenting and supporting nursing moms, paired with an unconventional approach to the world and a lack of tolerance for petty bullshit - it didn't take long for us to become close friends and confidantes.

Since then, we've led our LLL Group together, cyberschooled together, endured / enjoyed Lego Robotics teams together, and challenged ourselves at the dojang together. We've seen each other at our best and our worst, we've laughed and cried, talked each other "off the ledge" and logged countless (and I really mean countless) hours of in-depth conversations about life, parenting, marriage, interpersonal crap, strengths, weaknesses, perfectionism, frustrations, martial arts, literature, science, philosophy, education, gardening, homesteading, animal behavior, child behavior, adult behavior - and often the connections between the three.

We enrolled our young kids in Hogwarts Correspondence Academy one summer together and had much more fun with that than I think they ever did - putting together the curriculum, making wands, and imagining that owls were delivering lessons to our houses.

We've planned adventures and field trips, we've hiked and camped, relaxed at the pool and tubed on the creek.

We've also kicked, punched, grappled, swept, thrown, twisted and pinned each other. We've practiced kata, stressed over tests, talked through frustrations and celebrated each other's successes both in and out of the dojang.

You've shared your children with me and have loved and supported my own kids unwaveringly, even at their worst moments. You've helped me step back and see things through their eyes when I was ready to disown them; you've been the calm in my parenting storm more times than I can count.

You've seen me through some of the darkest times I've had, and have loved and listened and nurtured and served as the Voice of Reason more times than anyone should ever have to.

So today, on your birthday, I'm celebrating you and how much your friendship has meant to me these many years. Your impact on my life, my sanity, and my own journey as a mother, a wife, a martial artist, and a person has been immesurable. I love you dearly and wish for you a year of happiness and success, especially as you prepare for the challenges of 1) puberty and 2) your black belt test. (Both of which you will handle masterfully, I might add.) You are one of the strongest, smartest, and most loyal people I know and I am so grateful to have you in my life.

Happy Birthday!

XOXOX

Blogging on the Phone

So I finally got a Smartphone.

And this is gonna be short because I still don't have the hang of the touchscreen typing yet.

Fortunately my phone has an option that allows me to merely speak the words and they will appear on the screen. And I just used it.

Okay, that was totally cool. And a lot faster than typing with my thumbs.

I've downloaded facebook, my Nook books, and a bunch of other fun things. But no games. games would eat up what little extra time I have.

It's bittersweet giving up my old Tracfone, which does absolutely nothing cool, but has served me well over the many years I have had it. I once dropped it in a snow-covered field on a Girl Scout trip and went back to look for it two days later. When I called it, I heard its happy little ring right away. "I'm over here! Good to see you again!"

That kind of loyalty isn't easy to find in this world, let me tell you.

So now I have this new fancy-schmancy phone, and I'm already enjoying it very much. But I won't throw out my old Tracfone. My plan is to keep it around to hand to Little on occasion. He named it Kitty Fish Bar many years ago, for reasons I have yet to understand, and I know they will continue to have many good times together.

:-)

Okay, I'm Back

It was a beautiful wedding.

My sweet, wonderful cousin - who was just a little kid at my own wedding - married her best friend and soulmate today in a beautiful outdoor ceremony. A truly joyful occasion, and a wonderful chance to catch up with family members I don't often get to see.

Almost right away, two of them told me how glad they are that I'm blogging again and how much they enjoy and identify with what I write.

This came exactly a week after I had given it up, thinking no one would miss it, and feeling like the daily writing was becoming a bit of a chore.

A nudge from the Universe to start back up? Perhaps.

Another nudge came from my Philadelphia cousin who strongly encouraged me to train for the Philly Half-Marathon (he's running the entire marathon, but there's a half option too). 13.1 miles at the end of November could actually be do-able if I start training now.

I'm absolutely enthralled with the book Born To Run, which is teaching me all about running the way Nature intended, why Minimal Footwear is preferable to cushiony Nikes, and how people who do it right can run 100-mile Ultramarathons (which sort of puts 13.1 miles into perspective).

I have a place to stay and someone to line up with at the start of the race.

Savageman might consider it also.

So I printed out some training and injury-prevention programs to read tomorrow. My first priority this week is to decide if I am ready to test for my Green Belt Saturday, but getting my butt outside for a 4 mile run in the mornings certianly wouldn't hurt. And experience has taught me that the rest of my day tends to go much better when I start off that way.

Giving it some serious thought, and feeling grateful for my cousins and other family members I so enjoyed seeing today.